I feel blessed,i feel anxious,i feel at peace and i am so very glad to be alive.
The extramentals are going to start playing again and hitting the practice pad after a sabbatical of one and a half months..my throat itches to sing(wait thats also the weather change)The band has evolved from a tiny idea to this giant mountain,that it is today.Atleast in our minds.
I am amazed at the plan set out for us as we scurry around articulating plans and ideas of our own into our everyday life..thinking that yes...this is the day.
Thanks to my wonderful friends those who make music with me,those who will always be up for a random coffee or tea or the most retarded conversation or the most meaningful discussion,i have finally learnt to let "that" go.Life is the most amazing mystery there is,as cliche as it sounds and i am subtly gripping the edges of this book waiting to see just what might happen next.
"that" to me means just about a 100 different things and by letting it go i have gained a 1000 different keys to doors that open and doors i needed to lock.."that" is the things people may say to bring you down when they barely know you at all just so they won't fall."that" is the feeling you get when you think everyones watching only to see that no one looking at you at all."that" is the voice of doubt that you were never meant to be here or be this being that you have unwillingly found a way into."that" is the hours you spend becoming your today and always yearning to be more.
"This" i what i have now...
"This" is the feeling i love the most..of being content at night."This" is the life i love within these walls of red and black singing the songs that i know best in a language that is meant only for the best."this" is the moment i feel sane here beside me lays the truth and love that has held me so tight with love only to set me free in ways i knew nothing of."This" is what it feels like to fly without wings or engines.."this" is the silence that reminds me that you may not always fall by lending your hand to those who regret your standing tall.
"this" is the word i have for those who believe in more that whats within,the thought the breath and all of what we thinks makes us live at all."this" is the all and "this" is the nothing.
I have seen the most amazing places in my life...i have seen them in land in water in peoples eyes and in their fears their love their doubts their strengths i have seen the best scenarios in their lives.
I am blessed and i shall never forget it.I am the change for myself...my hand is yours whenever you need one my words are for you when you feel you must hear them.For all those who love me and show me how to love for all those i am yet to love...for all those friends i am yet to make and all the souls that have saved mine....
i am forever yours
